Dream Homes By Jeff Suppan

An interesting article for those non “Do-It-Yourselfers” who are already sick of updating their Fantasy Baseball Rosters two weeks into the season (or for those DIY fellows who also agree with Fred Romero and “Don’t have time for this *fill in blank here*” and all of your projects have stalled because you are concentrating on baseball… aka people like me).

Speaking of Do-It-Yourself (so you like to Do-It-Yourself?) home renovations, according to a very reliable news source, my favorite ex-Brewer Jeff Suppan is currently picking up side work to make ends meet in Omaha. A year after making $12.5 million with the Brewers plus getting the 2011 Buy-Out option of $2 million AND receiving the pro-rated league minimum from the Cardinals (who mistakenly signed the bum), Suppan is now playing for the Kansas City Royals minor league affiliate after already being cut from the Giants in 2011. Both teams signed the “Soup-pan” to minor league deals so both still owe him money, but it still isn’t enough to cover his Los Angeles restaurant “Soup’s Grill” (which doesn’t even specialize in soup which is even a bigger disappointment to me than his Brewer career).

To help pay his wife’s plastic surgeon mortgage, Jeff Suppan has agreed to help out local Omaha residents with “small pitching projects around the house“. I would take “Soup” up on his offer in a heart beat. I would make him throw cutter after cutter into my five 20-foot pine trees in the back yard until all are in campfire proportions. Or if his cutter can cut ceramic and glass tile with the 1/16th inch precision, he can finish my bathroom remodeling projects. I just want to see him fail in person so he can actually hear my jeers (and I can finally stop having nightmares of the 2008 playoffs).

It’s still scary that somehow Suppan keeps getting closer and closer to my actual residence…

Double fist bump to my brother-in-law, Too High?, for keeping me informed on my most hated Brewer’s life struggles.

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